You are going to have to forgive me as if I'm honest....I'm still not fully convinced that this is the best idea I have ever come up with but when it comes down to the fact that I am possibly about to loose the one person who has ever meant more to me than anyone else in this world, then you will understand, it kinda makes you do things you never thought you would ever consider doing in your life. EVER. So this is my attempt at trying to figure out what I'm going to do and really just a place that I can say what I'm thinking without being judged. I know some people will read this and just think do you not have any friends or something to talk to rather than posting it on a blog!? and yes I do, but honestly I don't think think any of them can begin to understand what it is that is happening and really...I can't face spending another evening crying into a glass of wine, eating boxes of maltesers while whaling along to Adeles 21! Its reached a stage where even I have to admit its a tad embarassing! So this has become my release, a place where I can put up some of my thoughts and if somebody out there reads this and is going through the same thing then maybe we might be able to work through this together :) X